I feel like I am several different people in one, and none of them is very confident or certain who they want to be.
So there is my “real” Facebook account, on which I am friends with a few people that I know/mostly knew in real life, including my in-laws. They are such a sarcastic, uncaring, judgmental, comparing bunch. I don’t even want to be known by them. My husband is also quite sarcastic. I have gotten upset enough that he tones it down a bit. I am too sensitive?
I am so over the friendly ribbing people do to one another. It is just meanness disguised as what…social fun. Bleh. Should those kind of people only spend time with one another. Then we would all be happier?
So my “real” Facebook account has been deactivated for a long time. I recently felt the need to go on there and unfriend a bunch of people from high school that I haven’t talked to since we graduated, and with whom I was never very good friends to begin with.
I also unfriended an old college friend who at one point I was close with, but then I got too needy and annoying so she started ignoring me. I’m not sure why she FB friended me in the first place – just for looky loo-ing I’m guessing.
Then I started thinking about her a bunch and got annoyed by it. Is it because she is thinking about me? I’m guessing she probably didn’t even notice my unfriending, so it’s probably all me. But then do you believe that if someone is thinking about you, then they will catch the vibe from the universe and start thinking about the person who is thinking about them? I don’t know. Maybe.
Then I have another FB account where I follow subjects and people that I’m actually interested in, spiritual stuff, whatever, things that I know the sarcastic in-laws will scoff at. I have “friends” on there, but they are mostly random people that I met through a FB group about awakening. They aren’t really friends at all.
Then I could get started on Twitter. So I created a Twitter account a while ago, and to my dismay, some of my in-laws found me on there and followed me. Bleh.
So I started a new Twitter account…but I was thinking of following people who are breatharians…and of course that kind of stuff is considered batshit crazy to most people and….meh…I should start another Twitter account just for that perhaps?!?
It’s tempting to stay off of social media all together, but then I need a little bit of a fix. I’m not an addict, I just need a sip or two – ha.
This blog isn’t doing it for me. I’m too whiny/annoying/negative to be popular on WordPress. I would try to interact more and leave comments, but then I’m not sure I even want people to click back and look at this blog. It’s supposed to be all about rainbows and sunshine if I want random people to read it.
Also the mental health professionals start following the blog. That’s always encouraging. I know I don’t sound like the most mentally healthy person, but please don’t pretend that you’re actually interested in reading my blog.
I sound pretty prickly today. Hopefully no one will read this. I don’t think it will be a problem.